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How to Find Love As a Black Woman?

To all single black women out there, first of all, it is totally fine to be single and you do not need a girlfriend or boyfriend to be complete. Yeah, it can be annoying when people keep reminding you that you are alone, but you will be fine without being in a relationship.

Karen Cruz
Karen Cruz

To all single black women out there, first of all, it is totally fine to be single and you do not need a girlfriend or boyfriend to be complete. Yeah, it can be annoying when people keep reminding you that you are alone, but you will be fine without being in a relationship. However, if the case is wanting someone to be in a relationship with, then this article is for you. Here, you will discover the steps you have to take in order to find love. I am no love expert, but as a woman of color who seeks my forever partner, I can personally relate to the realities, challenges, and frustrations of dating these days. Here's how you can find love.

Have an empowered love mindset.


This is rule number one. Your love mindset is everything. Whatever you believe you will continue to experience. If you keep on thinking that you are too intimidating or men only want you for sex or you are not capable of being in a relationship, then you will make yourself right about your belief. That will leave you feeling unloved. I know how hard it is to convince yourself that black women are not always and should not be overlooked, abused, unappreciated, and unloved, but you have to combat these disempowering narratives in order to find love. The first thing you have to do is think and believe that you deserve to be truly loved and that you will find someone who can treat you right.

It is important to practice gratitude.


Many black women see romantic love as something negative and scary. We can't blame them especially if they have bad experiences with their past relationships. But if you want to find love, gratitude for the love inside of you is vital. Start practicing gratitude. Learn how can you start to be more loving towards others and yourself. The best way to begin training yourself to focus on the love within you and around you is by having a love gratitude journal.

Know that you are worthy.


You might think that, of course, you are worthy because you are high-achieving, strong, and beautiful. But know that your worth does not come from your achievements, success, and beauty. You are worthy just because you exist. Keep that in mind. You are worthy of love, respect, true intimacy, and having relationships with men who see your worth. Cultivating your self-worth is very important to yield love. Whatever negative beliefs you have, you can change them by treating yourself as though you are worthy, even if you think you are not. This way, you will find the courage to start dating again and finding the person who can treat you right, love you right, and see your worth.

Stop competing with other women.


I think the world does not need women stepping on each other's gown and dissing each other's hair. Yes, society taught us that it is always great to be better than anyone else and being the sexiest, most beautiful, most successful, and richest person in the room will make you more desirable and worthy of love. But the truth is, romantic competition is trash. You are not for everyone and everyone is not for you. So it is best if we stop comparing ourselves with anyone else. Instead, know that you are beautiful enough, smart enough, and worthy enough to be irreplaceable. Lift up other women and spread love.

Stop expecting to be let down in love.


I think expecting to be let down in love is women's defense so they won't hurt that much in case it did not work out for them. But it is advisable to stop talking and thinking about how men are trash if you want to find love. Keeping that belief in mind will stop you from trusting people and giving them a chance. It is time to seek out people who can lift you up and for you to lift others up. One of the most important factors in your love journey is how you feel about it.

If you want to get more beauty advice, some hair care tips for dark-skinned women, travel inspirations, food tips, and literally anything that is helpful for people of color, be sure to check out Black Lifestyle.